Provincials

Quick recap for this one since there isn't much to discuss.

Ever since this event last year I had been looking forward to doing it again, another year stronger and especially after last week's little confidence boost in winning Bala. But there are so many variables in draft legal racing that I was just looking forward to mixing it up and putting in a solid effort.

After an absurdly long drive I got to the race site the day before to find that I wouldn't be able to get a pre-race swim in due to dangerously high levels of e.coli in the water. But it was made pretty clear at the pre-race briefing that we were swimming regardless of the risk. I don't mean to knock the race staff too much because they do work very hard to put this race on for developing/elite athletes. But it was a little disconcerting.

Race morning came around and everything felt pretty good in my warmup. I really wasn't nervous at all before the race, actually I was much more nervous last week for Bala. Everything felt routine and I was just ready to go.

Since I was one of only a few elite/U23's in comparison to the large number of juniors I had a good starting number and had a good position on the start line. But within literally the first second of the race I experienced the first of many times I got "Wiltshire'd".

As the gun went off the athlete behind me - rather than even attempting a swimming motion - grabbed my ankle with both hands and pulled me backwards. As I attempted to retake my position I was intentionally kicked by two more people. How do I know it was intentional? Well most swimmers don't kick with their heels in a normal swim stroke.

I did my best not to let it bother me and just tried to make up ground a little at a time, but I was absolutely disgusted by what went down in that swim. Many of the 40+ juniors were in their first draft-legal race. Maybe it was just some inexperienced/over-excited juniors, I call it blatant lack of respect and sportsmanship and it has no place in this sport, and I wish I had seen their names.

Anyway.

I'll admit that despite trying to shake all that off, I simply didn't have a good swim. Last year my swims were consistently bad. This year I'm just inconsistent...I guess I'll take it.

I was well back exiting the swim and made up 4 or 5 places on the 500m run up to T1. I was in no man's land getting on the bike with a few solo guys ahead of me, a line of stragglers behind me and a 5-6 man pack 1:10 up the road. I rode through another 3 or 4 guys by 2k in and realized that this far back in the race I wouldn't have anyone to work with on the bike. Chase 3 was barely in sight but it was either sit up and wait for a weak pack, or ride myself blind and see if I could put a minute into a 6-man group on my own.

At the first turnaround (5k) I knew at that effort (I averaged close to 45km/h to that point) I would either have to catch them soon or I would completely blow up less than 20 minutes into my race. The next 5k was just staying focused while I was riding at max effort until I finally bridged up on a small hill at 10k. We made a group of about 7 guys and for the last lap I just tried to recover enough to not be useless on my pulls, although the pace of the group was not very hot.

Lead the group into T2 and my legs actually felt pretty decent. But within 50m of the run I had to try to hold back throwing up. By 100m I had to completely stop and emptied my stomach on the side of the run course while my pack ran by. I had swallowed quite a bit of water (and ecoli) in the rough swim and with my effort on the bike my stomach gave in.

I couldn't move or breath for about 2 minutes while I was throwing up...and had to make the decision to either walk 100 meters back to transition and mope that my race at Provincials was done, or suffer through the run while everyone was passing me. Not much of a decision there.

Once I got rolling again I saw James who clearly was wondering why I was 2 minutes behind the group I lead into transition and I told him "I puked up all my breaky!". He told me just to focus on an even split and push through. A few hundred meters later I saw Craig Taylor who must have seen that I was suffering (or just felt bad that I was so far behind) and said "Be tough Ryan". Exactly what I needed to hear.

I was desperate to get some water in me after all that so I was just trying to survive to the aid station. And just my luck, no one could be bothered to set up the aid station for our race. Oh well, time to soldier on. I managed to get my legs moving a bit just before the turnaround, but about a minute later I had to pull over again and purged the rest of the ecoli I ingested earlier. Got going again, and started to find my legs through the cramps and heaving.

I finally crossed the finish line, 5+ minutes back of where I wanted to be, and managed to throw up one more time before finally finding some water. Turns out that - not counting the time that I spent on the side of the road puking - I ran about an 18:45 5k.

Old Ryan would be pretty pissed off about all that. But I'm actually ok with it. That was probably the toughest race I've endured...worst swim start I've ever been in, solo for most of the bike, sick on the run. But I sucked it up and did what had to be done. No excuses.

I vaguely recall mentioning that this was going to be brief. Sorry.

So with that little kick in the ass and a wake-up call that I'm still nowhere near where I need to be to find any success in draft-legal racing, I'm going to get reacquainted with my tri bike. Next up is the Tecumseh triathlon, then maybe a small tune-up in late August before the Esprit tri in Montreal. I'm hoping to find a good Olympic non-drafting race to finish off the year, but the verdict is still out on that.

If you're still reading I just want to share one more thing. My support crew from Bala!

Bala Falls

Every time my training/racing/attitude needs a kick in the ass Muskoka seems to the the place to go for me. I've been lucky enough this summer to have beautiful accomodations in Bala Falls aka "The Cranberry Capital of Ontario" that gave me a mental recharge after Welland along with some great training in the lakes and hills. And last weekend I was up again for one of my favourite races.

Last year the Bala Falls Triathlon was the race that really got my season rolling after an inconsistent first half of summer. I had another slow start this year...I haven't had any bad races this year, I've just been inconsistent. Either I race well or I don't even make it to the start line. So I was looking forward to Bala to set my attitude straight in racing and shed my own expectations that have been killing my performances.

Anyway...this is a race report and not another self-reflective rant.

The recent heat wave in Ontario has had two consequences: 1. lots of complaining about the heat, and 2. water temperatures have warmed up enough that almost all races aren't wetsuit legal (a rare occurance in Canada). The water on race morning was measured at 28 degrees, so being one of the stronger swimmers in this race (it's still strange for me to think that) I was just fine with it being no wetsuits.

Race strategy was to hit the swim and bike very hard and just play the run by ear, holding back if I felt I was digging a hole for the upcoming week. Within the first 25 meters of the swim I found myself swimming very comfortably in the lead. Generally this doesn't happen to me. And secretly being first out of the water in a triathlon has been a huge mental goal for me ever since I started taking swimming seriously (2-3 years ago I was a 28-min 1500 swimmer). But I just stuck to my race plan of swimming hard, and to my astonishment I was still leading at the first turn. Hmmm, better go fast and stay ahead!

Bala isn't a crazy competitive race, but there are 500+ athletes from across Ontario so chances are a few of them are fast. When I made the turn back to shore it crossed my mind that I might actually be first out of the water. So I kept the pace high and was thrilled when I hit the beach to a great crowd, first out with 30 seconds back to the next swimmer. Triathlon goal #1 complete. Goals 2 (win a Multisport Canada race) and 3 (win a World Championship race) still pending.

I hit the bike hard and was confident I was riding well. I used a road bike for this race last year and really appreciated the difference a fast tri bike and aggressive position makes...and maybe some extra fitness too (apparently 4 minutes worth over last year's 30k time). I had no one around me but was motivated that I was putting time into the MSC bike course vehicle on all the downhills. By the turnaround I was about 2 minutes up on 2nd but I was still riding scared. At about 22k I got to see Amanda ride by as she cheered me on (she kicked ass in a relay with her pops).

I had a big smile on my face when I got back to transition, realizing what it feels like to forget expectations and race to my true level of fitness. There was a lot of crowd support and I can see why this race is a classic with such a community feel to it. The run is crazy hard with endless hills on typical Muskoka roads so I tried to keep the run at a tempo effort and only give a little dig if I felt I needed more time. Despite keeping my effort in check the hills toasted my legs and I felt like I had knives in my quads over the last mile. No one was in sight but I was still running scared and didn't relax until I got over the last hill with 400m left. I was happy to finally win a race in Ontario, especially at such a cool race in the Multisport Canada series (goal #2 complete). Someone told me that it might have been a course record despite the swim likely being about 100m long.

So next up is a bit of a recovery week before elite provincials. I'm feeling good with my fitness, and even though I'll get my ass kicked in the swim draft legal racing is a lot of fun and I'm looking forward to improving on last year's result. I'll try to find and post pictures soon.

CCC O-Cup + Looking Ahead

Last weekend was my first race since Age Group provincials three weeks earlier...the Ciociaro Club O-Cup crit. I had been riding my TT bike exclusively for about two months prior to this race learning how to time trial so I wasn't sure how a crit was going to go. A lot of elite triathletes really struggle with draft legal racing because crit style racing is so different from time trialling - requiring a ton of high powered accellerations that can zap your legs pretty quickly. But with draft-legal provincials coming up in two weeks I needed a little tune-up race on the road bike.

I had to race in Cat4 again (ie. the lowest racing category) because I'm too cheap to pay the ridiculous $150 Ontario Cycling membership fee for one or two "workouts" a year. I would have thought that since I survived Springbank this one would be a walk in the park. But no one was willing to do any work and it made for a really sketchy race. The only time the pace picked up to anything respectable was when someone attacked. Besides that it was just an embarrassing display of handling skills and bickering in the group.

There were also a couple bad crashes, one of which I had to utilize all of my nijna training to avoid getting caught out when the two riders right in front of my went down and took out another 5-10 guys behind. Overall I really wasn't impressed with the experience, and afterwards I really appreciated the positive atmosphere around triathlon events. Anyway...I made my way up to the front for the last three laps, but everyone was so sketchy I was not prepared to risk a sprint finish in that pack with tri season being my priority. So I went for a hero move on the last lap and according to my powertap I averaged 655W over the final 1.3km. I was the only rider all day to make a gap on the group but with 200m left I saw the group coming back. I held them off until 100m to go when the sprinters were winding up and I sat up. I'm not fit enough yet to ride off the front of a large group at 50+km/h. But I'm getting close.

Looking forward, I will have taken over a month between triathlons, but the break has served well as a mental recharge and a solid block of training. Next up is Multisport Canada's Bala Falls Tri, one of my favourite events last year (which was also my first tri after a month's break last season). It's a beautiful venue and the course should suit me quite well given my training recently.

The weekend after Bala I'm back on the road to Ottawa for elite draft-legal provincials which also serves as a junior national series race...good news for me as I'll have more people to swim with! Depending on how that goes I will decide whether a late season ITU race is in the cards. If not I'll hit some competitive non-draft races - Windsor triathlon, Montreal Esprit, and possibly another crack at a half. I'm riding well so I might as well take advantage of that rather than force a ton of swim training and lose my advantage in a draft legal race.

I had the same feeling last year that the first half of my season seems like a wash with some mediocre results, some DNF's and all the big races still on the way. But I've been able to build on all my races so far and I'm ready to really hit the second half hard. Simply forgetting about the end results and focusing on pushing my limits is already starting to pay off.

Updates and some philosphical ramblings

Alright so I've been avoiding this one for a while now. I've been struggling with what to say but I feel somewhat accountable to those who read this, as my friends and supporters.

Last time I updated I was tapering for the Welland half and was expecting things to go smoothly and get revenge on the distance after last year in STX. It didn't exactly go as planned. Time to think back two weeks and see if I can pull out any lessons from the race.

It was going to be a fun weekend in Welland with Amanda (aka Leamington road trip buddy) doing the Saturday tri and then me doing the half the next day. Amanda had another awesome race and I want to share her coach's race report (Gabbi Whitlock of Balance Point Training)...I spectated and cheered with her while her athletes were racing and I hope she doesn't mind me sharing her recap:

It was a fun Saturday morning for me as I coach. It was a real pleasure to watch these ladies burn up the course. Welland is a timetrial swim start therefore you never know what place you are in. I heard someone call it a "truth" race as you are truly racing against yourself and the clock. Athletes were lined up in order of their bib numbers. Bib numbers were assigned based on when you signed up. Both Amanda and Ileana signed later so they had numbers near the back of the back - 230 and 242. Athletes started 5 sec apart. It was a rectangular swim course in the canal. Many women were out of the water before Amanda and Ileana even started the race.

Both ladies had strong swims. I can tell when my athletes are swimming towards the finish as I can recognize your swimming strokes. With this swim, the swimmers swam with the buoys to their right. I saw Amanda come around the top corner and heading towards the swim finish. I was standing at the top of a short hill that the athletes ran up after getting out of the water. It was weird because there was a short spot where I lost the view just before they got out of the water. There was a a volunteer helping people out of the water and people lined up on the side of entry. Some how between seeing Amanda swimming towards the swim finish and her getting out of the water, I lost track of her. I was thinking she should be out any moment. At the same time I saw Karen from the YMCA swim and MSZ getting out of the water and started to cheer for her. Then I was like ..where did Amanda go? There was a 450m run from the water to transition area. Amanda, Ileana and I had discussed taking off their wetsuits near the canal as the water would be all out of the suit by the time she got to transition and it would be harder to get off and also it would be hot to run in a wetsuit for 450m. So when I was wondering why Amanda wasn't out of the water yet, I looked over and there she was in the midst of getting her wetsuit off. I cheered hoping she would here me as I felt horrible to have missed her. (It turns out she must have been very close to Karen hidden by her). I am trying at races to learn how to take race photos in action. I got a funny one of Amanda with her leg in the air yanking off her wetsuit (photos to be shown later as they are not on this computer). I learned from my lesson and kept my eye on Ileana and got to see her finish her swim.

I was not able to see the transitions since it was 450m away from water. But I hear both had great transitions. During the warmup, we practiced both mount and dismount on the race day marked spots. This was especially important as the space was quiet small and you had to run around a tight corner up a curb for the bike out and bike in. This is where I waited for them to come back from the bike. I was watching the numbers of the people coming back. I had pre calculated when I thought Amanda and Ileana would be back based on when they went out. There was a turn about 15m before the mount/dismount line so you couldn't see the riders coming until just before the finish. Watching the numbers I was not seeing people anywhere near 200s and all of a sudden about three minutes before I was expecting her, I see the pink Multisport Zone suit coming towards me. Remember that people went out based on their Bib # assignment. Amanda came in with people mostly under 120. This means throughout the swim and bike she passed about 100 people! When I saw her coming, my stomach started making these nervous/excited butterflies. I was really happy for her. She had a fast run transition and off to the run. I stayed in position by the mount dismount and very close behind Amanda came another pink multisport suit Ileana. Both ladies had kicked butt on the bike course. Ileana came in also about three minutes ahead of my bike prediction and passing a very high number of people. It was such a pleasure to see how strong they both are on the bike. The butterflies continued.

I headed over to the finish line. The butterflies in my stomach wouldn't go away. I was jumping around unable to sit still thinking about how the ladies were putting themselves into situations of pain and getting to know this special friend. Making friends with the pain during the run makes for a great race. I knew they would be hurting but I was wishing them strength to push past it. When I saw Amanda approaching the finish, she had a great look of working hard and really pushing it on her face. I looked at Ryan and said she is in pain but a good pain! Ileana also looked really strong coming into the finish. She always has these great photo finishes and smiles. The race day was over for Balance Point and I was very super excited for both Amanda and Ileana!

It was a great day overall as both ladies stuck to their race goals and had impressive races. The test against themselves was won!

If you're still reading I'll tell you about my experience now...and what I've been avoiding talking about. I got a couple good activation workouts in on the Saturday and felt really tuned in for my latest go at long course. But looking back I was not in the right head-space for the race. I'm usually not too nervous before big races...especially if I'm confident in my training. But I got a terrible sleep the night before thinking about the swim. I couldn't eat anything on race morning and was gagging trying to force down half a Clif Bar and some coffee. I wouldn't admit it at the time but I was a nervous wreck over one simple thing...the time beside my name at the end of the day.

For those who are not familiar with Welland it's an extremely fast course. Canal swim, flat bike, flat and shaded run. You are supposed to go fast on a course like that. I was ranked #2 in the pro race behind last year's race winner Wolfgang Guembel. And I had a coveted "Recharge with Milk" pro interview if there already wasn't enough hype. Despite all the confidence I had gained from a solid block of training the only thought going through my mind was "what if." What if I have a crappy swim, what if I cut my foot on the rocks at the swim exit, what if I didn't ride 2:20, what if I fall apart again at 10k into the run.

Just as I got to the race site, strolling in quietly so I wouldn't be seen, my one thought was immediately replaced by another..."I am so F***ING stupid." I left my wetsuit and my nutrition in the hotel. With all the equipment required to do a triathlon and all the stuff you have to remember for a pre-race routine, the only thing I've ever been dumb enough to forget before have been pins for my race belt.

I think at that point I just shut down mentally. It didn't cross my mind that I could race without them, or that I could just give it hell and see what happens despite the circumstances. I was too concerned what my swim split would be in the pro wave. I was so clouded by the thought of what other people would think of me that I sabotaged my own race.

So I feebly attempted to haul ass back to the hotel 25km away in Niagara Falls. I have to say Amanda was the best support crew I could ever have, but I was too stubborn to listen to her that everything would be ok. At the time I simply couldn't fathom getting a 4 hour race underway in the mindset I was in.

We got back to the race site 30mins before the start and I didn't want to get out of the car. I tried running a little and my brain told my body that I felt too sick and too sore to start. So I shamefully drove back to the hotel and went back to bed. My biggest fear in it all was telling James that I f*cked it up so bad. But he told me exactly what I needed to hear, and it's taken this long for it to sink in enough to explain all this.

I don't do triathlons to meet my or others' expectations, and I don't do them because I'm good at it. Triathlons are fun. You get to do three sports in a row...any one of which most "normal" people consider crazy. You get to push yourself to the limits of human will, but you also get to splash around in a lake and call it training. Having such a royal f*** up of a "race" has become a blessing in disguise because it has allowed me to get back to the basics: back to why I got into such a cool sport.

I've had more than a few people (well-respected coaches, high end athletes, sports physicians) tell me I should just be a roadie. "Your back can't handle triathlon training...you're a better cyclist than you are a triathlete...you have better power numbers than a Cat 1/2 sprinter...". Beyond the true sense of community and FUN at a triathlon event - especially compared to the bickering and frustration of cycling - I don't do anything because I'm good at it. I do triathlon because I want to push myself and I find enjoyment in self-improvement. So it's back to training and onto the next race. No more mind games.


I was going to do an update on goings-on lately with training, some low key races and my plans for the rest of the season, but I'm pretty confident no one is reading this far down the page. So I'll save that for another time...